Children and Their Friends

There is little in the life of a child that brings as much pleasure or pain as their friends. So how do you help your child deal with the highs and lows that a life with (or without) friends can bring? The use of these common sense guidelines will help the concerned parent.

Don't worry if your child is content with just one or two friends; not all of us can be social butterflies. However, if she is concerned about having few friends you can help by making your home an inviting place for young people to gather. One way to do this is to try inviting your child's classmates for a play date. Simply ask your child which of their classmates they like at school, get to know their parents and issue the invite.

In the event that your child's current best friend is stolen by someone else, you will need to help your child realize that they shouldn't restrict their attachments and try to have as many friends and acquaintances as they can. One thing about younger children is that they do sometimes invent imaginary friends. Be assured that it is not a sign of mental instability, but merely an indication of an active imagination. Encourage this in your child, and do not try to stop them from expressing themselves in this manner. You do want to, however, keep an eye on them as the play that children use when alone is a great indication of what is going on in their lives, and you just might be able to find out important information this way that you would not have otherwise.

The biggest problem that many parents and caregivers run into is the apparent change of behavior that many children undergo when their friends are around. There are many different approaches that you can utilize in such situation. The recommended way is that even if you don't like the way your child behaves in the company of certain friends, you may not want to criticize your child in front of those friends. This could lead to resentment, and start a pattern that is difficult to break later in life. This is not to say that you cannot correct your child if they display unacceptable or inappropriate behavior, just do what you can to do this in an unobtrusive manner. You are going to learn a lot about your child, while at the same time being able to show by example what kind of language and manners you find both appropriate and acceptable.