Children's Bedtime Rituals

Patterns are important to children, and as such they like to have patterns in their lives. The reason for this is that they know what is going to happen next, in other words, they know what to expect. So, it is little wonder that when bedtime roles around, they like to have their rituals. Unfortunately, for most families the bed time rituals that have come about is one of conflict and headache. Here are some helpful hints to get the right rituals recognized.

• Before setting up your new bedtime rituals, watch your children closely for a few days. You want to do this so that you can learn when exactly the child becomes tired. This is an important factor in determining when to begin your child's bedtime ritual. If you begin the ritual too soon, they will not actually be ready to go to sleep, where as if the time is too late, they may actually become too tired to sleep.
• Talk over the planned ritual with your spouse or partner earlier in the day. Actually plan out what will go on, and discuss it as the other person in your child's life may have noticed something that you did not. You want to do this earlier in the day, as opposed to later in the evening because chances are you will be tired (just like your child) later in the evening, and it is therefore easier to make a decision. Some of the things to consider are things like how to implement the new routine, how to set limits, and so on.
• You can also talk with your child to see what they would like to do at just before bedtime. Would they like a story, to say prayers, have one last bath, all the above, or none of them. What you may like to do before bed does not necessarily translate into something that your child will enjoy. Be sure you are taking the distinct and unique tastes of your child into consideration when coming up with any new routines or rituals.
• Once you have come up with the new rituals and have started to use them in your child's everyday routine, ensure that you are implementing them consistently. The routines do little or no good if they are not consistent in their application. This means that if you are going away for the night, and a babysitter is going to be stepping in, leave a list of your children's rituals for the babysitter to follow. This way the child is going to feel more secure, and knows that Mom and Dad going out is not the end of the world.