Teaching Your Children Responsibility

I've worked with many people in my career and, inevitably, there is always an irresponsible coworker who thwarts the organization of the entire office. When it happens, I wonder what went wrong in that person's life that they didn't learn personal responsibility and accountability along the way. We have a coworker who lacks problem-solving and planning skills. When she finds herself in a time crunch because she procrastinated starting a project, the rest of us have to stop working on our own project to help complete hers, so that our clients receive their materials on time. Yet management seems to look the other way when Sue displays irresponsible behavior, only caring about the end result, and not the means that got us there.

One of the best lessons a parent can teach a child is that of being a responsible person. Part of teaching responsibility is accountability. Follow these tips for teaching children how to grow into responsible adults, and how to realize that for every action we choose, there are consequences:

• Get an early start. Set age-appropriate tasks at home and start teaching how to complete tasks and chores while your children are still toddlers.
• Teach by example. If the phone rings, yet you don't want to talk to anyone, don't tell you spouse, "Tell Jim that I'm not home!" Your children will overhear and learn that it's okay to lie. Model responsible behavior if you expect your children to be responsible.
• Take advantage of teaching opportunities. If you're at the store with your children and you see someone behaving irresponsibly, point out that fact to your children. Ask them how a situation could have been handled better had the person made another choice. Allow them to brainstorm about how things could have been handled differently, for a better outcome.
• Discuss choices and consequences. Teach your children that for every choice they make there is a consequence. Stress to them that a consequence does not have negative connotations and is simply a result of a good or bad choice. Provide examples such as, "If Bob does this, what will happen?" Allow your children to surmise potential outcomes for choices made.

When teaching your children about responsibility, don't overlook teaching financial as well as social responsibility. Teach your children while young how to manage their money and how important it is to save money for later when they may need it. As your children grow, show them your budget and how saving money from your paycheck now will help to pay the rent or grocery bill later.