Helping Your Teen Resist Peer Pressure

Ah, the days of being a teen...I wouldn't have them back. Peer pressure is a hard thing to deal with at such a tender age. And some teenagers seem intent on pushing other teens around and telling them what to do, while still others are willing to be told what to do and doing it. I remember the pressure I personally felt to become more and more like one of the big pop star age peers of mine. They were all dressed up to look older than they were and they were leading the kinds of lives I'm now very glad I didn't. But back then, that kind of girl was the type who got the attention of the boys. Looking back, I don't really care what those boys thought, because I didn't marry that kind of man, but I confess there's a little part of me that wants to tweak their little stuck up noses for not realizing what a great girl I was. I regret now trying to be more like those other girls, even though I wasn't very good at it. It wasn't worth the kinds of boys it attracted, and I was so much better off being myself.

First of all, when helping your teen resist peer pressure, help him to know that he is loved. He will be less likely to go out looking for a family unit if you can create or enhance the one between the two (or more) of you. Teach your teen that he is worth too much to you for her to be careless with herself.

Next, teach your teen that his "friends" will often try to pressure others into their own situation so they don't feel uncomfortable. Drinking alcohol, for example, is not legal in our country for teens to do, but if other teens can get your teen to do it, then not only is your teen less likely to tell on them, but will be in the same kind of trouble if both are caught. There's also the conscience factor, as in, "He agreed to do it, too, so it must be okay."

Also, be an escape route for your teen. Let them blame things on you if they have to in order to get out of a bad situation. "I can't, my Aunt Rita said she'd kill me if I ever joined a gang."

Lastly, be sure your teen knows she can talk to you if she needs to do so. Let her know you care about the things that she cares about, even if it's only because they affect her.